Can You Live With a Parent in Senior Apartments?

If your parents are experiencing severe health issues or cannot live alone, you might be looking into senior living facilities or communities. If you decide to live with them to monitor their care better, you're not alone, as approximately 29% of family caregivers report that their care recipients live with them. While that's fine if you're living in your own home, is it possible to live with a parent in a senior apartment?
You can live with a parent in some senior apartments, which allow live-in caregivers. It's even easier to move in with your parent if you are above the age restriction defined by these communities, such as if you're above the age of 55 and want to move into a 55+ community.
In this article, I'll explore what you need to know about living with your parent in a senior apartment and things to consider before signing your parent up for one. I'll also explain how the rules between different senior apartment complexes can differ, highlighting the importance of researching before deciding on a living situation for your parent.
Why You Can Usually Live With a Parent in Senior Apartments
Every senior apartment building or community has its own rules regarding whether or not adult children of the residents, or younger residents in general, are allowed to live there. Generally, the rule states that no one under 62 is allowed to live in a 62+ community.
When it comes to 55+ communities, the rules are not as strict.
However, property managers are allowed to set their own rules, so they can state that no person under the age of 55 is allowed. Or, they might allow people of younger ages to live there, temporarily or permanently. Generally, communities don't allow children under the age of 18 to live there permanently.
Whether you're looking for a senior community or a senior apartment for your parent, it's important to note that both of these housing options usually also restrict their residents to being 55+ or 62+ years of age.
That said, there can be different rules depending on the facility in question, so it's advisable to ask questions and find out the living conditions to provide your parent with the best care.
What Is the 80/20 Rule?
The 80/20 rule means that if 80% of the senior living community comprises people 55 years and older, the remaining 20% of its residents can be younger. This rule originates from the Fair Housing Act, which ensures that at least 80% of units in the community need to be occupied by at least one person who's 55 years or older.
Generally, senior living communities follow the rule that at least one person in the household has to be older than 55. There is usually an age restriction for other members in the household, whether they're a child or spouse. But, you may want to check with the facility if you have children, as you might not be able to live with your parent and have your children live there too.
Usually, the age limit for one's spouse is 40 and 18 for a child. When it comes to children, such as in the case of a senior's grandchildren, there are usually rules in place that determine how long the children are allowed to stay in the apartment.
Some senior living complexes or communities allow seniors to live with a limited number of family members, with a healthy ratio also being 80:20. Therefore, the landlord could prevent a senior from living in the community of their choice if they don't consider this ratio and want to bring their entire family to live with them.
Although the 80/20 rule is in place, it's important to realize that senior living communities aren't required to let younger residents live in them if this 80% requirement has been met.
This is why it's essential to ask the staff at the senior apartment complex about this so that you can find out what you need to know and if any opportunities are available for you to live with your senior parent.
Living With a Parent in a Senior Apartment: Pros and Cons
If you've been given the green light to live with your parent in a senior apartment, it's important to consider how much both of your lives will change. There will be adjustments to be made, such as when it comes to taking care of your parent and having your own life at the same time.
You should be aware of some advantages and potential drawbacks before you move into a senior apartment with your parent.
Pros
- There's 24-hour security. One of the biggest concerns you might have when living with your parent is that they could be a crime target when you aren't around. However, you won't need to worry about this in a senior apartment complex because there will be security measures in place at all times.
- You have professional help at hand. Although you might want to help your parent with various tasks, there might be some that you cannot do, such as picking them up if they fall or bathing them. A senior apartment with on-site staff can help you and your parent deal with difficult situations.
- You can focus on your relationship with your parent. One of the biggest benefits of moving into a senior apartment with your parent is bonding with them without having to be a full-time caregiver.
- You can relieve some stress. Moving into a senior apartment that offers amenities and assistance will reduce some of your stress, which can help both you and your aging parent.
- Senior apartments provide a range of amenities. There are great amenities available to residents, such as physical therapists, exercise classes, and pharmacies.
- They can help your parent maintain a positive attitude. With amenities like game rooms, salons, barber shops, and swimming pools, a senior apartment can help your parent feel at home and optimistic about life.
- Your parent will have reduced living expenses. Staying at a senior apartment with your parent will cut daily expenses, as most of these apartments are cheaper than traditional apartments and retirement homes.
Cons
- Finding a senior apartment is challenging. If you're searching for a low-income apartment, you might have to get onto a waitlist.
- A senior apartment might be difficult for your parent to navigate. If your parent struggles to climb stairs or walk around, finding a first-floor apartment is essential.
- Some senior apartments don't allow pets. The complex might have restrictions on the type, size, or number of pets allowed.
- Meals are not always provided. Unlike senior living communities that provide meals, this isn't always the case for senior apartments.
- Chores won't always be handled by staff. Senior living communities help maintain the apartment, but this isn't always the case with senior apartments.
- Senior apartments can be costly. The national cost for assisted living is $4,500 per month on average.
- You might feel removed from your life. Living in a senior apartment as a younger person might feel strange, especially if you have a busy life.
Tips for Caring for Your Aging Parent in a Senior Apartment
Senior apartments don't always provide the required amount of healthcare or other assistance. So, if you're going to be moving in with your senior parent, it's essential to ensure that you'll be able to help them.
Install Grab Bars in the Bathroom
You can prevent injuries and make your aging parent's tasks easier by installing a grab bar in the bathroom. I recommend the Budding Joy Shower Handle 2-Pack Grab Bars, available on Amazon.com.
Set Up an Uninterrupted Power Supply (UPS)
Accidents can happen when a power failure plunges the senior apartment into complete darkness. I'd recommend the APC UPS Battery Backup and Surge Protector (available on Amazon.com).
Purchase a Wheeled Walker
To help your aging parent be more independent if they have mobility issues, I'd recommend Drive Medical Deluxe Folding Walker with Wheels from Amazon.com.
Install Easy-To-Use Doorknobs
If your parent suffers from arthritis, consider these Able Life EZ Door Knob Grips from Amazon.com. They have a wing-tipped design with glow-in-the-dark inserts.
You can buy homes built specifically for people above 55 years old. They're usually located in a retirement community protected by neighborhood police officers. Can You Buy 55+ Condos or Homes for Your Parents?

About Chip Mitchell
Chip Mitchell is the founder of Growing Gray USA. With over a decade of experience owning a home care company, he has helped hundreds of families navigate the complexities of caring for aging parents.
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